Thursday, May 3, 2007

Energy Tree

A post on Treehugger profiles a new concept called the Energy Tree. A real tree is connected to your homes electrical system and watered according to the homes energy consumption. If you blow dry your hair - boom - no water for the tree. Well, it's probably not so direct but the more power you consume the less fertiliser and water your tree receives. A simple concept, really. The more efficient your household, the more your tree is likely to flourish.

This device seems to be banking on the human capacity for guilt. It's a inventive concept, but those likely to feel guilty about not watering a tree probably are already feeling guilty for leaving the light over the stove on overnight.

I propose something different. We apply these devices to childhood development. Every newborn child will be fitted with a device at the back of the neck. It can control eating as well as perform other functions. It will be wirelessly connected to your home and car. If you idle your car - boom- no dinner for your son. Forget to turn off the tap while brushing your teeth - boom- your daughter gets electroshock currents buzzing through her body. Parents around the world will be sitting in darkness afraid their consumption will retard their children's growth. And the children, they will be the future saviours of our planet! They will be at the forefront of developing the most energy-efficient devices!

I say screw the Energy Tree, long live the Energy Child.


Jazzy said...

You are going to make a great dad one day Jon, no seriously.

Jeannette said...

oh jon.

anyway, it kind of does work like that anyway. the more plastic bags my mom uses and the more meat my dad eats is slowly killing their unborn grandchild!

w00t w00t!

reese said...

hahaha. I think that's hilarious!!!